What if I told you that the path to true contentment isn’t always what it seems?
The Stoics didn’t chase happiness in the usual way we think of it today. What they teach us about contentment is often the opposite of what we expect—but it’s incredibly powerful.
In this article, I’ll walk you through seven surprising habits inspired by Stoicism that can lead to lasting contentment.
They might not be the ones you’d expect, but trust me, once you embrace them, your perspective on life will change for the better.
Let’s dive in!
1. Embracing discomfort
We’re often taught to avoid pain, to seek comfort at all costs. However, the Stoics believed that facing discomfort head-on is essential to building inner peace and resilience.
When you willingly expose yourself to challenges—whether it’s physical discomfort, emotional pain, or even the fear of failure—you learn to rise above them. You stop letting these discomforts control you. Instead of dreading them, you learn to see them as opportunities for growth.
As Seneca wisely noted, “Manliness gains much strength by being challenged.” (Moral letters to Lucilius/Letter 13)
The more we confront what scares or unsettles us, the more we realize how capable we are of enduring and thriving.
This habit doesn’t just make you tougher—it gives you a sense of mastery over yourself, which leads to a deeper contentment. Instead of being shaken by every discomfort, you become grounded, knowing you have the strength to face whatever comes your way.
2. Detaching from outcomes
Have you ever felt anxious or frustrated when things didn’t go the way you planned?
We’ve all been there. But what if the key to contentment lies in letting go of our need to control the outcome?
The Stoics teach us that we should focus on our actions and not the results. As Epictetus said, “Ask not that events should happen as you will, but let your will be that events should happen as they do, and you shall have peace.” (The Discourses of Epictetus)
The truth is that we can only control our efforts—not the external circumstances or the outcome of those efforts.
By detaching from outcomes, we free ourselves from the constant anxiety of wondering whether we’ll succeed or fail. Instead, we find peace in knowing that we’ve done our best, regardless of the result.
This shift in mindset allows us to stay calm, focused, and content, even when life doesn’t go exactly as planned.
The beauty of this practice is that it brings a sense of freedom. You’re no longer bound by the fear of failure or the need for things to turn out perfectly. You can simply do your best and let life unfold as it will.
3. Practicing voluntary simplicity
I’ll be honest, this is one habit that didn’t come easily to me.
Like many people, I thought happiness was tied to acquiring more—more things, more experiences, more success. But over time, I realized that constantly chasing after more only left me feeling overwhelmed and unsatisfied.
The Stoics believed that contentment comes not from what we possess but from how little we actually need. Seneca put it perfectly: “That which is too little for luxury is abundantly enough for nature.” (Seneca’s Morals, 1882)
By deliberately simplifying our lives and reducing our attachment to material things, we free up space for what truly matters—peace of mind, meaningful relationships, and inner fulfillment.
For me, practicing voluntary simplicity meant cutting back on unnecessary possessions, saying no to commitments that didn’t align with my values, and learning to find joy in the small, everyday moments.
It’s not about depriving yourself—it’s about being content with enough and realizing that most of what we chase is superfluous.
Once I embraced this, I felt lighter, more present, and more at peace with what I had. The clutter, both physical and mental, was gone, and I could finally focus on the things that truly brought me joy.
4. Focus on your Reactions, not events
One of the most transformative Stoic habits is learning to focus on how you react to events, rather than the events themselves. Life is full of unpredictable twists and turns, many of which are out of our control. But what is within our control is how we respond.
As Marcus Aurelius wisely wrote, “Get rid of the judgement; you are afraid of the ‘I am hurt’; get of the ‘I am hurt’, you are rid of the hurt itself.” (The Meditations of the Emperor Marcus Antoninus, 1944)
This mindset shift was a game-changer for me. Instead of wasting energy trying to control external situations or getting frustrated when things didn’t go my way, I started focusing on mastering my reactions.
When something unexpected or unpleasant happens, I now pause and ask myself, “Is this worth getting upset over? Can I change it, or should I adapt?”
By doing this, I’ve found that I’m able to stay calm in situations that would have previously sent me spiraling.
Focusing on our reactions not only reduces stress, but it also empowers us. We may not control the circumstances, but we control how we interpret and respond to them. This habit builds emotional resilience and, ultimately, contentment, because it reminds us that peace comes from within, not from external events.
5. Focusing on your own path
In our modern world, it’s easy to get caught up in what everyone else is doing, achieving, or acquiring.
But as Marcus Aurelius reminds us, “How great a rest from labor he gains who does not look to what his neighbor says or does or thinks, but only what he himself is doing.” (The Meditations of the Emperor Marcus Antoninus, 1944)
When you focus on your own path, you free yourself from the exhausting cycle of comparison and competition. Instead of worrying about whether you’re keeping up with others, you start measuring your success by your own standards.
This creates a sense of peace and fulfillment, because your energy is spent on what truly matters to you, not what others think.
By keeping your attention on your own actions and progress, you cultivate a more genuine sense of accomplishment and inner satisfaction—one that’s not dependent on the opinions or achievements of others.
6. Helping others
Seneca captured this idea perfectly when he wrote: “He that does good to another man does good also to himself.” (Seneca’s Morals, 1882)
By focusing on acts of kindness and generosity, we shift our attention away from our own worries and desires. Instead, we become part of something larger than ourselves—lifting others up and, in turn, finding a deeper sense of purpose.
This habit fosters a sense of interconnectedness and reduces feelings of isolation or dissatisfaction.
When you serve others with no strings attached, you free yourself from the constant chase for personal gain, which often leads to frustration. In its place, you experience a quiet contentment that comes from knowing you’ve made a positive impact in someone’s life.
7. Reflecting on mortality
It might sound morbid, but regularly reflecting on mortality is one of the most powerful habits for cultivating contentment. The Stoics practiced memento mori—the act of remembering that life is fleeting—not to be gloomy, but to live more fully in the present.
Marcus Aurelius wrote, “You may depart from life at once; act and speak and think in every case accordingly.” (The Meditations of the Emperor Marcus Antoninus, 1944)
This reminder isn’t about fearing death but embracing the impermanence of life. When you realize that time is limited, it changes how you live your days. You stop putting off important things, stop worrying about trivial matters, and start appreciating the present moment more deeply.
For me, reflecting on mortality has been a wake-up call to live intentionally. Instead of getting caught up in the rush of everyday life, I now ask myself, “If today were my last day, would I be proud of how I spent it?”
This habit helps me stay grounded, focused on what truly matters, and content with the life I’m living right now—not some distant version of it.
By accepting the brevity of life, we free ourselves from the fear of the future and the regret of the past, finding peace in the here and now.
The bottom line
Incorporating these counterintuitive Stoic habits into your life can lead to a deeper, lasting sense of contentment. It’s not always about chasing happiness but learning to cultivate peace within yourself.
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And don’t forget to share your thoughts in the comments—we’d love to hear how you find contentment in your daily life!
What would Marcus Aurelius say?
Unsure what to do next in your career? Struggling to move on from a failed relationship? Searching for more meaning in life?
Marcus Aurelius can tell you how to face your challenges in a more Stoic way.
Simply ask your question, and Marcus Aurelius will answer.
