These days, maintaining a calm and composed demeanor can often seem like an insurmountable challenge.
The ups and downs, uncertainties, and stresses can easily overwhelm us, leading to emotional turbulence that can impact our overall wellbeing. But what if there was a way to stay calm in any situation? To navigate life’s storms with an unshakeable equanimity?
Well, there is.
Stoicism, an ancient Greek philosophy, empowers us with the wisdom to distinguish between what we can control and what we cannot, thus instilling in us a profound sense of peace and tranquility. This philosophy is not about suppressing emotions; instead, it’s about understanding them, managing them, and aligning actions with rational thought.
In this article, we will explore seven Stoic habits that you can incorporate into your daily life.
These habits are not quick fixes; they require consistent practice and application. However, once ingrained into your routine, you will notice a significant difference in your ability to remain calm amidst the chaos of life.
Let’s dive in.
1) Understand what’s in your control
Ever found yourself in a situation where you’re stressing over something that’s totally out of your hands?
We all have.
Whether it’s worrying about the weather on the day of your big outdoor event, or fretting over a friend’s opinion of you, we often expend energy on things we simply cannot control.
The Stoics, however, had a different approach. They believed in focusing only on what was within their control and accepting what was not.
Ask yourself: Can I control this? If the answer is no, then it’s time to let go and focus on what you can actually influence.
This shift in perspective can significantly reduce stress and anxiety, helping you stay calm even in the most challenging situations.
2) Practice mindfulness
How often do we find ourselves dwelling on past mistakes or worrying about future uncertainties, instead of focusing on the present moment?
Our minds have a knack for time travel, but unfortunately, this doesn’t always serve us well.
The Stoics knew the value of being present. They understood that we can only act and make decisions in the here and now. By practicing mindfulness, we can keep our focus on what’s happening right here, right now, and respond calmly and rationally.
Let me share a personal example. A while back, I was preparing for a big presentation. Instead of focusing on my preparation, I found myself worrying about potential negative outcomes – what if I forgot my lines? What if my presentation was not engaging enough?
This anxiety was not only unhelpful but also took away valuable time I could have used to prepare better.
When I realized this, I decided to practice mindfulness.
I began focusing solely on the task at hand – preparing for the presentation. I started paying attention to each slide, each point, each word. This helped me not only prepare better but also reduced my anxiety significantly.
In short, focusing on the present is a simple yet powerful Stoic habit that can help us stay calm and composed in any situation.
3) Accept change as part of life
As the famous Stoic philosopher, Marcus Aurelius once wrote, “All things are petty, easily changed, vanishing away.” (The Meditations of the Emperor Marcus Antoninus, 1944)
The point? Change is an integral part of life.
Yet, so many of us resist it, fear it, or get upset when it happens.
We often strive for permanence in a world that is inherently impermanent. This can lead to a great deal of stress and anxiety. However, by accepting change as a natural part of life, we can maintain our cool even when things don’t go as planned.
The Stoic philosophy encourages us to embrace change rather than resist it. It teaches us to adapt and adjust, to be like water that flows around obstacles instead of crashing against them.
When we accept that change is inevitable and learn to adapt, we release ourselves from the stress and anxiety of clinging to the familiar. We open ourselves up to new possibilities and experiences, and in doing so, we find a sense of calm amidst the flux of life.
4) Cultivate gratitude
A few years back, I found myself stuck in a cycle of continuous dissatisfaction. No matter what I achieved or how well things were going, it never seemed enough. I was constantly chasing the next big thing, the next milestone, the next success.
Then, I stumbled upon Stoicism and the practice of gratitude. The Stoics believed that by appreciating what we have, we can find contentment and peace. They suggested reflecting on the simple things we often take for granted – our health, our loved ones, the food on our table, the roof over our head.
I decided to give it a try and started maintaining a gratitude journal. Every night before bed, I wrote down three things I was grateful for that day. It could be as simple as a good meal, a chat with a friend, or a beautiful sunset.
This simple practice transformed my outlook on life. Instead of focusing on what was missing, I started appreciating what I had. It calmed my restless mind and brought a sense of contentment and peace.
Gratitude is a powerful tool that can help us stay calm by shifting our focus from what’s wrong to what’s right in our lives. Give it a shot.
5) Practice self-discipline
Self-discipline is a virtue highly valued by the Stoics. It is the ability to control one’s feelings and overcome one’s weaknesses; the ability to pursue what is right despite temptations to abandon it.
Stoicism teaches us that while we can’t always control what happens to us, we can control how we respond. This control comes from self-discipline. When we practice self-discipline, we can make rational decisions rather than being led by our emotions or desires.
This doesn’t mean suppressing our feelings. Instead, it means understanding our feelings but choosing to act based on reason and wisdom. For instance, instead of lashing out in anger, we can choose to express our feelings calmly and constructively.
Practicing self-discipline helps us stay calm because it prevents impulsive reactions that can escalate stress or conflict. It empowers us to respond to life’s challenges in a composed and rational manner.
6) Seek wisdom
The Stoics believed that wisdom was the highest virtue. They defined wisdom as the understanding of why things happen, and having the ability to apply that knowledge in a practical and beneficial way.
Seeking wisdom involves continual learning, questioning, and expanding your understanding of the world around you. It means being open to new perspectives and ideas, and willing to adjust your beliefs when faced with compelling evidence or reasoning.
By seeking wisdom, we can better understand the nature of things, including our own emotions and reactions. This understanding can help us make better decisions and respond to situations in a more thoughtful and calm manner.
7) Live according to nature
Finally, one of the core principles of Stoicism is living in accordance with nature. Now, this doesn’t mean you have to give up all your possessions and live in the woods (though you could if you wanted to). Instead, living according to nature means recognizing and accepting our place as part of a larger system.
It’s about understanding that we are part of the natural world and that we are subject to its laws and rhythms. It means accepting that just as the seasons change, so too do our lives. There will be times of growth and times of decay, times of activity, and times of rest.
When we live in accordance with nature, we are better able to accept these changes and transitions. Instead of fighting against them, we can flow with them, maintaining our calm and composure even when things don’t go as planned.
Living according to nature also means recognizing our own nature – our strengths, our weaknesses, our desires, and our fears. By understanding ourselves better, we can make decisions that are in line with our true nature and values. This can lead to a greater sense of peace and calm.
The bottom line
Stoicism offers a time-tested framework for staying calm amidst the whirlwind of life’s challenges.
By cultivating these habits, you can navigate any situation with grace and composure.
But remember, these habits aren’t a quick fix but a lifelong practice. Start small, pick one or two habits to focus on, and gradually incorporate more as you progress.
We’d love to hear from you. How do you stay calm in stressful situations? Have you tried any of these Stoic habits? Let us know in the comments!
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Until next time, stay Stoic.
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What would Marcus Aurelius say?
Unsure what to do next in your career? Struggling to move on from a failed relationship? Searching for more meaning in life?
Marcus Aurelius can tell you how to face your challenges in a more Stoic way.
Simply ask your question, and Marcus Aurelius will answer.