8 things real Stoics avoid doing in public

Real Stoics understand that they can’t control the world around them, only their response. This philosophy extends into public spaces as well.

For real Stoics, there are certain behaviors they intentionally avoid in public. These actions reflect their inner strength and discipline.

Here, I’m going to share with you eight things that genuine Stoics steer clear of when they’re out in the world.

Let’s dive in.

1) Displays of strong emotion

Stoicism is all about maintaining a calm, composed demeanor, regardless of what life throws at you. This philosophy is rooted in the understanding that we can control our reactions, even if we can’t control our circumstances.

In public settings, real Stoics steer clear of showing intense emotion.

Whether it’s extreme joy, anger, or sadness, they avoid these public displays. It’s not that they don’t feel these emotions; rather, they believe in managing them privately.

They understand that such outward expressions can often lead to unnecessary drama and misunderstandings. Moreover, they recognize the power of maintaining an even-keel in demonstrating their inner strength and discipline.

2) Gossiping or spreading rumors

True Stoics understand the power of words and the potential harm they can cause. They consciously avoid engaging in gossip or rumor-spreading in public spaces.

I remember an instance where I was at a social gathering. The conversation around me turned into gossip about another person who wasn’t present. It was tempting to join in, to feel part of the group. But then, I remembered the Stoic principles.

I chose not to contribute to the gossip. Instead, I steered the conversation towards a more positive topic. It wasn’t easy, but as a Stoic, it was the right thing to do.

3) Reacting impulsively

One of the cornerstones of Stoicism is the cultivation of self-control. This extends not just to emotional reactions, but to physical ones as well.

Impulsive actions are often driven by immediate emotional responses rather than rational thought. They can lead to regrettable decisions and outcomes.

Historically, the Stoic philosophers were known for their ability to maintain composure in the face of adversity. Even in extreme situations, they would always pause to think before reacting.

If you aspire to live like a Stoic, always take a moment to think before you act or react. It can make all the difference.

4) Seeking validation from others

A key tenet of Stoicism is the understanding that our worth is not determined by external validation. Real Stoics avoid seeking approval or praise from others, especially in public settings.

They believe in self-validation and understand that their value comes from their actions, principles, and integrity, not from others’ opinions. They strive to do what’s right, regardless of whether it’s recognized or applauded.

This isn’t to say that Stoics are indifferent to feedback. They value constructive criticism and use it for personal growth. However, they never let others’ views dictate their self-worth.

5) Ignoring those in need

Stoicism is more than just controlling emotions and reactions; it’s about understanding our place in the world and our responsibility towards others.

Real Stoics never turn a blind eye to those in need. They recognize that we are all part of a larger community and have a duty to help where we can.

Whether it’s lending a comforting ear, offering a helping hand, or simply showing kindness to a stranger, Stoics understand the power of compassion.

It’s not always easy to step outside of our own problems and concerns, but the act of helping others can bring a sense of fulfillment and contentment that is deeply rooted in Stoic philosophy.

6) Avoiding difficult conversations

Stoics value honesty and authenticity, even when it’s uncomfortable. They don’t shy away from difficult conversations, understanding that these are often necessary for growth and resolution.

I recall a time when I had to confront a friend about their behavior that was affecting our relationship negatively. It would have been easier to let it slide, to avoid the discomfort of confrontation. But as someone guided by Stoic principles, I knew I had to address it.

I approached the conversation with respect and honesty, focusing on the issue at hand rather than attacking their character. It wasn’t easy, but it was necessary.

7) Being overly judgmental

We all have our battles and challenges. However, Stoics avoid passing hasty judgments on others, particularly in public settings.

They believe in giving people the benefit of the doubt and understand that everyone is on their own unique journey. They know that it’s not their place to judge others based on limited information or personal biases.

Instead of being quick to judge, Stoics practice empathy and strive to understand others’ perspectives. This doesn’t mean they condone harmful behavior, but they approach situations with an open mind and a compassionate heart.

8) Abandoning their principles

Above all, Stoics are guided by a strong set of principles. They value integrity and consistency, and they never compromise their beliefs for the sake of convenience or popularity.

Being a Stoic means adhering to your principles, even when it’s difficult, even when no one is watching. It’s about standing up for what’s right and staying true to your values.

In public spaces, this might mean speaking out against injustice, refusing to partake in unethical behavior, or simply living in a way that aligns with your values.

A final reflection

Stoicism isn’t merely a philosophical concept; it’s a way of life that can be profoundly transformative.

The Stoic principles of emotional control, self-discipline, compassion, integrity, and authenticity are timeless. They hold relevance today just as they did in the times of Epictetus, Seneca, and Marcus Aurelius.

Practicing Stoicism in public spaces is about more than just maintaining an image. It’s about living out these values in our interactions with others, in our reactions to situations, and in our decisions.

The famous Stoic philosopher Marcus Aurelius once said, “Waste no more time arguing what a good man should be. Be one.” This encapsulates the essence of Stoicism – it’s about actions, not just words.

As you navigate through the bustling crowd of life, remember these Stoic principles. They’re a roadmap to living a life of virtue and tranquillity.

So take a moment to reflect: How will you embody Stoicism in your public life?

Let us know in the comments!

What would Marcus Aurelius say?

Unsure what to do next in your career? Struggling to move on from a failed relationship? Searching for more meaning in life?

Marcus Aurelius can tell you how to face your challenges in a more Stoic way.

Simply ask your question, and Marcus Aurelius will answer.

Check it out here.

 

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