Do you ever wonder what truly defines a good person?
While society often focuses on external actions and success, Stoicism takes a deeper look at the inner qualities that shape our character.
Today, we dive into the subtle yet significant signs that reveal someone’s true nature. If you’ve ever questioned the behaviors that separate good from bad, this exploration might just provide some enlightening insights.
Let’s get to it.
1) They lack empathy
“Habituate yourself not to be attentive to what another has to say, and so far as possible be in the mind of the speaker” – Marcus Aurelius (The Meditations of the Emperor Marcus Antoninus, 1944)
Stoic philosophy emphasizes the importance of empathy in our interactions with others.
I remember a situation from my own life that highlights this. I had a friend, let’s call him Mark, who was always quick to point out the flaws in others. Yet, he rarely took the time to understand their circumstances or see things from their perspective.
Once, a mutual friend of ours was going through a tough time. Instead of offering support or understanding, Mark was quick to judge and dismiss her struggles. He saw her difficulties as a sign of weakness, rather than an opportunity for empathy and connection.
This lack of empathy clearly shows a person’s character deficit. The ability to understand and share the feelings of others is not just about being kind; it is about acknowledging our shared humanity.
Without it, it’s hard to be genuinely good.
2) They’re focused on material possessions
In a world where the latest gadgets and luxury items are often seen as status symbols, it’s easy to get caught up in the pursuit of wealth. But Stoic philosophy warns against this tendency.
The ancient Stoics like Seneca and Marcus Aurelius often emphasized the importance of focusing on virtues instead of material wealth. They believed that true happiness and goodness come from within, not from the objects we possess.
This Stoic principle serves as a reminder that being overly focused on material possessions can be indicative of a shallow character. Instead, a good person should strive for self-improvement and personal growth, valuing virtues over valuables.
3) They lack gratitude
“Do not think of what are absent as though they were not existing, but ponder on the most fortunate of what you have got, and on account of them remind yourself how they would have been missed, if they had not been here.” – Marcus Aurelius (The Meditations of the Emperor Marcus Antoninus, 1944)
In my earlier years, I found myself often focusing on what I didn’t have. I was caught up in a cycle of dissatisfaction and longing, always chasing the next thing without appreciating what I had.
But then I came across Stoicism, and it taught me the value of gratitude. The Stoics believe that we should appreciate what we have, no matter how little it may seem. They argue that the key to contentment lies not in having more, but in wanting less.
Ever since embracing this philosophy, I’ve noticed a significant shift in my outlook on life. Now, instead of focusing on what’s missing, I spend each day acknowledging and appreciating my blessings – a practice that has brought me immense peace and contentment.
So, when someone constantly craves more without appreciating what they already have, it’s a clear sign they are not aligned with the Stoic notion of a good person. Gratitude isn’t just about being thankful; it’s about recognizing and appreciating the value in everything we have.
4) They’re quick to anger
“Anger is unwarrantable as it is unjust: for it falls many times upon the wrong person, and discharges itself upon the innocent instead of the guilty” Seneca (Seneca’s Morals, 1882)
Stoicism places great emphasis on emotional resilience and tranquility. Stoics believe that anger, like any other emotion, should be controlled and not allowed to dictate our actions.
If someone is quick to anger, it shows a lack of emotional control, which is contrary to Stoic values. Stoics argue that anger often leads to irrational actions and clouds our judgment.
5) They lack humility
“When you have adopted the simple life, do not pride yourself upon it, and if you are a water-drinker do not say on every occasion, ‘I am a water-drinker.’ And if you ever want to train laboriously, keep it to yourself and do not make a show of it.” – Epictetus (The Discourses of Epictetus, 1916)
Stoics believe that no matter our accomplishments or status, we should always remain humble.
Someone who lacks humility, who is arrogant or boastful, shows a misunderstanding of their place in the world. They forget that we are all part of a larger whole and that we each have our strengths and weaknesses.
Humility is not about downplaying our achievements, but about acknowledging that we are no better or worse than anyone else. It’s about recognizing our faults and continuously striving for self-improvement.
A good person, according to Stoicism, is humble and always ready to learn and grow.
The bottom line
The Stoic philosophy presents a profound understanding of human behavior and character.
It reminds us that virtues such as self-control, empathy, gratitude, and humility are crucial in defining our character.
These traits are not just ideals to strive for; they are choices we can make every day. They represent the path to self-improvement, personal growth, and ultimately, a fulfilling life.
What would Marcus Aurelius say?
Unsure what to do next in your career? Struggling to move on from a failed relationship? Searching for more meaning in life?
Marcus Aurelius can tell you how to face your challenges in a more Stoic way.
Simply ask your question, and Marcus Aurelius will answer.
