We all know them – those folks who seem cool as a cucumber on the outside, but inside, they’re constantly on high alert. They’re in survival mode, even when things seem calm.
This dichotomy can be hard to understand. After all, how can someone appear so tranquil while their inner workings are going full throttle?
These individuals often exhibit certain behaviors that give away their true state of mind. They’ve mastered the art of appearing calm while fighting battles within.
In this article, we’ll explore the seven behaviors typically displayed by people who are outwardly calm but internally in survival mode. This insight could help you better understand the people around you… or even yourself.
1) Constant vigilance
We’ve all seen them – those individuals who always seem to have their eyes on the horizon, even when everything appears peaceful and serene.
This behavior is a classic sign of someone who is calm on the surface, but internally, they’re always on guard. They’re in survival mode, constantly scanning their environment for potential threats and risks.
When you’re in survival mode, your brain is wired to detect danger. It’s a primitive response that harks back to our ancestors, who needed to be constantly aware of their surroundings to stay alive.
These individuals are not paranoid or anxious; they’re simply wired differently. They’ve learned to maintain a calm exterior while their internal radar is always switched on.
Being aware of this behavior can help us better understand these individuals. Rather than dismissing them as overly cautious or paranoid, we should recognize that they are simply doing what their brains are wired to do – keep them safe.
So next time you notice someone always scanning the crowd or checking out exits, remember – they might just be one of those people who appear calm but are in survival mode underneath.
2) Struggling with sleep
Sleep, an essential part of our lives, can be a real struggle for those in survival mode. I can personally attest to this.
There was a time when I was in a high-stress job. On the surface, I was cool and composed, handling back-to-back meetings and deadlines with apparent ease. But underneath, I was in constant survival mode.
And it started to affect my sleep.
I remember nights where I would just lay in bed, my mind racing with thoughts about the next day’s tasks, looming deadlines, potential hiccups. My body was desperate for rest, but my mind was stuck in overdrive, refusing to shut down.
This is a common experience for those living in survival mode. The constant state of alertness can make it difficult for the brain to switch off and allow the body to rest. And without proper sleep, it’s even harder to maintain that calm facade.
So if you know someone who always seems calm but struggles with sleep, they may be dealing with more than just insomnia – they could be in survival mode.
3) Hyper-focused on details
People in survival mode often display an unusual ability to focus on minute details. This is because when you’re in survival mode, your brain is wired to pick up on the smallest signs of danger or change.
This hyper-focus isn’t just a random trait. It’s a survival mechanism. Studies have found that our ancestors who were better at noticing and remembering small details were more likely to survive and pass on their genes.
So if you find someone who seems remarkably observant, catching tiny changes or abnormalities that others miss, they might be in survival mode. This heightened awareness can be a powerful tool, but it also means their brain is constantly working overtime.
4) Preference for control
Another behavior that those in survival mode often exhibit is a strong preference for control. This isn’t about being bossy or domineering, but rather about wanting to control their personal environment and situations.
When you’re living in survival mode, unpredictability can feel threatening. Having control over one’s circumstances can provide a sense of safety, reducing the feeling of chaos or uncertainty.
These individuals often plan meticulously and are extremely organized. From scheduling their day down to the minute, to having contingency plans for various scenarios, they leave nothing to chance.
This need for control is their way of mitigating risks and ensuring their survival. So if you notice someone who meticulously plans and organizes everything, they could be masking an internal survival mode with their external calm.
5) Exhaustion that goes beyond physical tiredness
Living in survival mode is draining. I’m talking about a deep level of exhaustion that goes beyond what a good night’s sleep can cure.
A few years ago, I found myself in a situation where I was constantly on edge, always anticipating the next problem to solve. On the outside, I was the picture of calm, always ready with a solution. But inside, I was running on fumes.
This kind of exhaustion isn’t just about being physically tired. It’s a mental and emotional drain that comes from being constantly alert and prepared for anything that might go wrong.
It’s like running a marathon every day – only the finish line keeps moving further away. It takes its toll and can leave you feeling completely worn out.
So if you see someone who appears calm but often expresses feeling tired or drained, they may be living in survival mode beneath their composed exterior.
6) High resilience in the face of adversity
People who are calm on the surface but in survival mode underneath often display remarkable resilience. They’re able to bounce back from setbacks and keep going, even when things get tough.
This resilience stems from their constant state of readiness. When you’re always prepared for the worst, you develop the ability to adapt and recover quickly. It’s a survival mechanism that enables them to navigate through difficulties.
You might notice these individuals handling crises with surprising composure or recovering from setbacks faster than others. While this resilience is certainly admirable, it’s essential to remember that it also indicates a continuous state of survival mode beneath their calm demeanor.
7) Hidden emotional turmoil
The most crucial thing to understand about people who are outwardly calm but live in survival mode is the emotional turmoil they often experience in silence. Behind their tranquil exterior, they may be grappling with fear, anxiety, or stress.
This emotional turmoil is the price they pay for being constantly on high alert. It’s the invisible battle they fight every day, even while presenting a calm facade to the world.
Understanding this hidden struggle can help us empathize with these individuals and offer them the support they need. It’s a reminder that appearances can be deceiving, and we should always strive to see beyond the surface.
Final thought: It’s more common than you think
The human mind is a complex entity, capable of extraordinary feats. It can mask turmoil with tranquility, convert fear into focus, and channel stress into resilience.
Living in survival mode while maintaining an outward calm is not an anomaly. In fact, it’s more common than you might think. Our fast-paced, high-stress world often pushes individuals into this state without them even realizing it.
Renowned psychologist Abraham Maslow once said, “The ability to be in the present moment is a major component of mental wellness.” This statement rings especially true for those living in survival mode. Their constant state of alertness and readiness often robs them of the ability to live in the present.
As we navigate through life, let’s remember this: Not everything is as it appears on the surface. The calmest person in the room might be fighting battles within.
So as we wrap up our discussion on this topic, I leave you with this thought – let’s strive to understand people beyond their exterior calmness, acknowledging their inner battles and offering empathy and understanding wherever we can.
What would Marcus Aurelius say?
Unsure what to do next in your career? Struggling to move on from a failed relationship? Searching for more meaning in life?
Marcus Aurelius can tell you how to face your challenges in a more Stoic way.
Simply ask your question, and Marcus Aurelius will answer.
