We’ve all had moments when we preferred our own company, right?
But for some of us, that preference extends beyond the occasional need for solitude. There’s a select group of individuals out there who don’t just tolerate being alone – they thrive in it. What’s their secret?
Well, more often than not, they display certain traits – traits that can be traced back to the ancient philosophy of Stoicism. Curious?
Let’s dive into it.
1) They know that struggle can make us stronger
We’ve all heard the saying, “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.”
This philosophy is central to Stoic thinking and is embraced by those who thrive in solitude. Stoics understand that challenges and hardships are not only inevitable but also valuable opportunities for growth and resilience.
When faced with difficulties like loneliness, instead of succumbing to despair or seeking immediate comfort, Stoics view these struggles as a chance to build inner strength and character. They believe that adversity can teach us valuable lessons and help us develop the fortitude needed to navigate life’s ups and downs.
This mindset allows them to embrace solitude without feeling overwhelmed by loneliness or fear. They know that every struggle they endure makes them more self-reliant and capable of handling future challenges.
By seeing struggles as opportunities rather than setbacks, they cultivate a resilient spirit that thrives in the face of adversity.
2) They don’t need validation from others
Ever felt the pressure to fit in or seek approval from those around you?
It’s a common struggle, but for some, the need for external validation holds little sway.
Stoics, in particular, embody the principle of not relying on others for validation. They understand that true self-worth comes from within, not from the opinions or approval of others. This mindset allows them to be genuinely content with who they are, without needing external affirmation.
True Stoics focus on their own values, principles, and standards, rather than seeking affirmation from external sources. This self-reliance breeds a strong sense of inner peace and confidence, making them less susceptible to the fluctuating opinions of others.
By not needing validation from others, they free themselves from the constant pursuit of approval, allowing them to live more authentically and contentedly.
This detachment from external validation not only fosters self-sufficiency but also reinforces their ability to thrive in solitude. They don’t need others to tell them they are doing well, or badly or whatever, they trust their own judgement.
3) They value self-sufficiency
I remember a time when my car broke down in the middle of nowhere. No signal, no roadside assistance, just me and a malfunctioning engine.
At that moment, I realized the importance of self-sufficiency and how it can sometimes be the only thing standing between you and a disaster.
Stoics value self-sufficiency highly.
They believe in the power of controlling what’s within our reach and letting go of what’s not. They understand that life is unpredictable and that depending on others for our happiness or security can lead to disappointment.
When you’re self-sufficient, you’re not reliant on others for your needs or happiness. You’re content with your own company and don’t feel the need to seek validation or companionship from outside sources.
This doesn’t mean Stoics are antisocial; they enjoy socializing just as much as anyone else. But they also understand the value of being able to stand on their own two feet.
4) They know that all things pass
Stoics understand that everything is transient and that change is inevitable. They believe that by accepting this fact, one can lead a more content life.
This acceptance can also make solitude more bearable, even enjoyable. If you know that your current state, whether it’s being alone or being with others, is temporary, then you’re less likely to feel distressed about it.
You understand that people come and go, situations change, and that’s just part of life.
So, instead of fearing loneliness, those who accept impermanence simply see it as another phase that will eventually pass. They find comfort in knowing that nothing lasts forever, not even loneliness.
This mindset allows them to live alone without feeling lonely.
5) They focus on personal growth
Last but not least, for those who thrive in solitude, personal growth is often a primary focus.
Stoics, in particular, place a high value on continuous self-improvement and self-discovery. They see solitude as an opportunity to reflect, learn, and grow without the distractions and influences of others.
By dedicating time to personal growth, they develop a deeper understanding of their strengths, weaknesses, and values. This self-awareness allows them to set meaningful goals and pursue them with purpose and determination. Whether it’s through reading, meditation, or honing a skill, they use their alone time to invest in themselves.
By prioritizing personal growth, they transform solitude into a productive and enriching experience. It becomes a time for introspection, self-improvement, and setting the foundation for a more meaningful and purposeful life.
The bottom line
Living alone doesn’t have to mean feeling lonely. By embracing these Stoic traits, you can turn solitude into an opportunity for growth, self-discovery, and inner peace. Your solo journey might just become your greatest adventure.
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What would Marcus Aurelius say?
Unsure what to do next in your career? Struggling to move on from a failed relationship? Searching for more meaning in life?
Marcus Aurelius can tell you how to face your challenges in a more Stoic way.
Simply ask your question, and Marcus Aurelius will answer.
