There’s a certain allure to those who carry quiet confidence. It’s a trait that commands respect, without being overbearing.
People who embody this kind of confidence usually follow certain Stoic principles, whether they know it or not. These principles guide their actions and interactions, making them calm, collected, and hard to shake.
In this article, we’re going to delve into 7 such principles that these quietly confident individuals often live by.
Let’s dive in.
1) They accept what they cannot control
One of the cornerstones of Stoicism is the understanding that there are things in life we simply cannot control.
People with quiet confidence understand this principle innately. They don’t waste energy fretting about the uncontrollable. Instead, they focus on what they can influence – their own actions, thoughts, and responses.
This acceptance frees them from unnecessary stress and worry, allowing them to navigate life’s ups and downs with a calm and steady demeanor.
It’s not about resignation or apathy, but about focusing your energy where it can make a real difference.
2) They live in the present
Another principle that those with quiet confidence often embrace is living in the present moment.
I can personally attest to the power of this stoic principle. There was a time when I was constantly worried about the future, always planning, forecasting, and trying to predict what would happen. It was exhausting and left me feeling anxious.
Then, I stumbled upon Stoicism and its emphasis on the present moment. I began to realize that my constant future-gazing was robbing me of the joy and peace available in the now.
I started practicing mindfulness, grounding myself in the present moment. Instead of fretting about a meeting next week, I began focusing on what I was doing right now, whether it was work, talking to a friend, or even just enjoying a cup of coffee.
The transformation was incredible. My stress levels plummeted, and confidence began to grow within me. I found myself better equipped to handle whatever came my way because I wasn’t constantly distracted by what ‘might’ happen in the future.
Living in the present moment is truly liberating, and it’s a principle anyone can practice to cultivate their own quiet confidence.
3) They focus on being true to their values
Stoics place a high value on virtue – qualities like wisdom, courage, justice, and temperance. They believe that cultivating these virtues leads to a good life, regardless of external circumstances.
Quietly confident individuals often embody this principle in their daily lives. They strive to act with integrity and fairness, treating others with kindness and respect.
Living in alignment with these virtues fosters a deep sense of self-respect and inner peace. It’s not about seeking validation from external sources but knowing that you’re living in accordance with your own values.
This internal alignment is a powerful confidence booster. It’s the kind of confidence that doesn’t need to shout or show off. It’s quiet, steady, and unshakeable because it’s rooted in the knowledge that you’re living your truth.
4) They embrace challenges as opportunities
Stoics view challenges not as setbacks, but as opportunities for growth and self-improvement. They recognize that adversity is a part of life and choose to use it to their advantage.
This perspective is often shared by those who exude quiet confidence. They don’t shy away from difficulties. Instead, they face them head-on, seeing them as chances to learn, grow, and become stronger.
When we see challenges as opportunities rather than threats, we’re less likely to be overwhelmed by them. This mindset fosters resilience and a quiet confidence that remains steady even in the face of adversity.
So, the next time you face a challenge, try seeing it through the lens of opportunity. It may not make the challenge disappear, but it can certainly change how you approach it and how it impacts your confidence.
5) They let go of the past
Here’s something I’ve learned over the years: holding onto past mistakes and regrets can hold you back. It’s like carrying a heavy backpack – it weighs you down and prevents you from moving forward.
Stoicism teaches us the importance of letting go. It encourages us to learn from our past, but not to be shackled by it.
As someone who used to dwell on past missteps, this principle was a game changer. I realized that each mistake was an opportunity to learn and grow, not a life sentence. I learned to let go of my past mistakes, not forgetting them, but no longer allowing them to dictate my self-worth.
Understanding this principle helped me develop a quiet confidence. I became more comfortable with myself, knowing that while I’m not perfect, I’m always striving to be better.
This ability to let go, learn from our experiences and move forward is a powerful tool in building quiet confidence. It allows us to step into the future unburdened and ready for whatever comes our way.
6) They embrace the power of self-discipline
Self-discipline might not sound exciting, but it’s a fundamental aspect of Stoicism and quiet confidence.
Stoics believe in the power of controlling our actions, responses and emotions. They understand that while we can’t control everything that happens to us, we can control how we react.
People with unshowy confidence have a strong sense of self-discipline. They set goals for themselves and stick to them, not because of any external pressure, but because they know it’s in their best interest.
This discipline isn’t about being rigid or inflexible. Instead, it’s about making commitments to oneself and following through. It’s about acknowledging that while instant gratification can be tempting, long-term rewards are often more satisfying.
7) They value inner peace over external validation
The most important thing to understand about quiet confidence is that it comes from within. It’s not about how others perceive us but how we perceive ourselves.
Stoics place a high value on inner peace and self-acceptance. They believe that our worth isn’t determined by external achievements or validation but by our character and virtue.
People with quiet confidence live this principle every day. They don’t seek approval from others because they know their worth comes from within. They strive to be the best they can be, not to impress others but to fulfill their own potential.
This inner peace fosters a deep-seated confidence that doesn’t waver with changing circumstances or opinions. It’s a confidence that comes from knowing that you are enough, just as you are.
Final thoughts
When we peel back the layers of human behavior and character, we often find timeless principles at their core. One such principle is that of Stoicism, a guiding philosophy for many who exude quiet confidence.
This isn’t a coincidence. Stoic principles like accepting what we cannot control, living in the present, and valuing inner peace over external validation are powerful tools for fostering deep-seated, unwavering confidence.
Marcus Aurelius, a renowned Stoic philosopher and Roman Emperor, once wrote, “You have power over your mind – not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.”
This sentiment encapsulates the essence of quiet confidence.
When we internalize these principles, we shift our focus inward, grounding our confidence in our own values and character rather than external factors. This is the root of quiet confidence.
Did you enjoy this post? If so, why not join our regular newsletter for more insights and posts? You can do so by popping your mail in the box below.
Until next time, stay Stoic.
What would Marcus Aurelius say?
Unsure what to do next in your career? Struggling to move on from a failed relationship? Searching for more meaning in life?
Marcus Aurelius can tell you how to face your challenges in a more Stoic way.
Simply ask your question, and Marcus Aurelius will answer.
