When you hear the word “Stoic,” what comes to mind? Maybe an emotionless figure who never flinches in the face of adversity? Or perhaps someone who remains indifferent to the joys and sorrows of life?
Today, we dive into nine damaging misconceptions about what it means to be a Stoic.
1) Being Stoic means being emotionless
One of the most common, and perhaps the most dangerous, misconceptions about Stoicism is the idea that being a Stoic means being emotionless. But is that really the case?
Of course not. Stoicism isn’t about suppressing or ignoring your emotions. It’s not about pretending you’re an emotionless robot who’s immune to feelings of joy, sorrow, love or anger.
Instead, Stoicism encourages us to understand our emotions, to reflect on them, and ultimately, to not let them control our actions or decisions.
It’s about gaining mastery over our emotional responses and not letting them dictate the quality of our lives.
So, if you’ve been imagining Stoics as cold-hearted individuals devoid of any feelings, it’s time to re-evaluate that image. Being a Stoic doesn’t mean you stop feeling; it means you start managing your feelings in a healthier and more productive way.
2) Stoics are indifferent to everything
Another misconception people often hold is that Stoics are indifferent to everything around them – kind of like that friend who shrugs at every movie suggestion, claiming they don’t care what’s playing. But is this really what Stoicism preaches?
In reality, Stoicism doesn’t advocate for total indifference, but rather for discernment. It teaches us to distinguish between things we can control and things we can’t.
For instance, I remember when I lost my job unexpectedly. Initially, I was consumed by worry and frustration. But then I took a Stoic approach.
Instead of fretting over the job loss – something I couldn’t control – I decided to focus on my response to the situation – something within my control. I started looking for new opportunities, upskilled myself, and used the time to reconnect with my professional network.
This shift in focus didn’t mean I was indifferent about losing my job; it meant that I directed my energy and attention towards aspects that were within my control.
3) Stoicism is all about enduring pain
So let’s say you’ve stubbed your toe on the coffee table (ouch!). According to some misconceptions about Stoicism, you’re supposed to grit your teeth, bear the pain, and pretend it doesn’t hurt. But is that really what Stoicism is all about?
Contrary to this belief, Stoicism doesn’t advocate for enduring pain for the sake of it. Instead, it suggests accepting the presence of pain and understanding it as a part of the human experience. It’s not about pretending the pain doesn’t exist but recognizing it and managing our reactions to it.
In the scenario of the stubbed toe, a Stoic approach would mean acknowledging the pain, understanding that it’s a temporary sensation, and not allowing it to ruin your entire day. Stoicism encourages us to understand that discomfort is a part of life, but we have control over how much we let these discomforts affect our overall well-being.
So no, Stoicism isn’t about masochistically enduring pain – it’s about managing our reactions to discomfort and not allowing them to overshadow our lives.
4) Stoicism promotes isolation
Some people misinterpret quotes like these to mean that Stoicism promotes isolation or detachment from society. But does it really?
The answer is a resounding no. Stoicism doesn’t promote isolation; instead, it encourages engagement with society in a meaningful and mindful way. The Stoics believed strongly that we are put on this earth to work together.
As Marcus Aurelius wrote, “We are all working together to a single end.” He also wrote, “Do not waste the balance of life left to you in thought about other persons when you are not referring to some advantage of your fellows.” (The Meditations of the Emperor Marcus Antoninus, 1944)
While Stoics advocated for independence in thought and emotion, they also understood the importance of connections and relationships.
In essence, being a Stoic doesn’t mean you retreat into a shell; it means being present and engaged in your interactions, all while maintaining your emotional independence
5) Stoicism is pessimistic
I remember a conversation I had with a friend a few years back. We were discussing philosophy, and when I mentioned my interest in Stoicism, she immediately said, “Oh, but isn’t that a bit pessimistic?”
It’s a misconception that I’ve encountered many times since.
The reality is quite the opposite. Stoicism isn’t about expecting the worst; it’s about preparing for it. While it might seem like a minute difference, it’s an essential one. Stoics practice what’s known as ‘negative visualization’ – they consider the worst-case scenarios not to dwell on them, but to lessen the impact if they do occur and appreciate what they have now.
For instance, when I was starting my own business, I envisioned various challenges I could face – like not making profits in the first few years or facing stiff competition. This wasn’t because I was being pessimistic, but because I was preparing myself to tackle these challenges head-on and appreciate the progress I was making.
I know Stoicism might appear pessimistic on the surface, it’s actually a philosophy grounded in practicality and gratitude. It’s about being prepared and appreciating what we have – far from being pessimistic.
6) Stoicism is a quick fix for life’s problems
In our quick-fix culture, it’s easy to fall into the trap of believing that Stoicism is a magic bullet, a fast solution to all of life’s problems. But can we really expect to adopt a few Stoic principles and wake up the next day with all our troubles magically vanished?
I think you know the answer.
Stoicism, like any worthwhile philosophy, isn’t a quick fix. It’s a lifelong practice and a journey of personal growth. It teaches us to reframe our perspective on life’s challenges and gives us tools to manage them better.
However, it doesn’t promise to eliminate these challenges overnight. Instead, it offers a new way to navigate life, encouraging resilience, acceptance, and self-control. Implementing Stoic principles requires continuous effort and practice.
if you’re looking for an overnight miracle, Stoicism will disappoint you (as will most things). But if you’re looking for a sustainable and profound approach to improving your life, then Stoicism has plenty to offer. Just remember – it’s a marathon, not a sprint.
7) Stoicism is outdated
Last but not least, there’s a misconception that Stoicism is outdated, a relic of the past with no relevance to our modern lives. After all, it was developed thousands of years ago in ancient Greece and Rome. But does its age really make it obsolete?
Far from it. The principles of Stoicism are timeless and incredibly applicable to our lives today. In a world where we’re constantly bombarded by external stimuli and pressures, Stoicism offers a way to find inner peace and resilience.
Whether it’s dealing with stress at work, managing personal relationships, or coping with life’s unexpected twists and turns – the teachings of Stoicism can provide valuable guidance. It encourages us to focus on what we can control, accept what we can’t, and strive to live virtuously.
Its principles continue to resonate with millions around the world, helping them navigate life’s challenges with grace and resilience.
The bottom line
Stoicism, as we’ve seen, is often misunderstood. It’s not about being emotionless, indifferent, or pessimistic. Instead, it’s about understanding our emotions, focusing on what we can control, and preparing for life’s challenges.
It’s a timeless guide for living a fulfilling life, available to all of us.
We’d love to hear your thoughts. Have you encountered these misconceptions? How has Stoicism impacted your life? Share your experiences in the comments below – let’s learn and grow together in our understanding of this profound philosophy.
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What would Marcus Aurelius say?
Unsure what to do next in your career? Struggling to move on from a failed relationship? Searching for more meaning in life?
Marcus Aurelius can tell you how to face your challenges in a more Stoic way.
Simply ask your question, and Marcus Aurelius will answer.
